My Adventures Down Under!

I was very very fortunate to have had the opportunity to work in Australia for 3 months in 1997. Here is a memory page of that trip!

	Brisbane, Queensland
	The Gold Coast
	Cairns / Port Douglas / Daintree , Queensland
	Melbourne, Victoria
	Fun with Aussie Lingo

Brisbane, Queensland

The first city I worked in was Brisbane. One of the neatest things I remember is that when I looked out my office window, I could see the big red kangaroo logo on the Qantas Airlines building next door. It was a constant reminder that I was NOT in Houston!

Brisbane is where I learned the following:

	Aussies drive on the left side of the road, therefore, they also walk on the left side of the hallways and sidewalks. I "danced" with a lot of people (much to their annoyance) until I trained myself to walk past people to the LEFT!
	The chirping sounds you hear at night at the City Botanic Gardens are not birds. They're BIG-ASS BATS ON STEROIDS!!! I remember looking up and seeing a flying chihuahua with a 4-foot wingspan. I later learned that these aren't "bats".... they're Flying Foxes. I also learned to steer way clear of any trees they may be hanging out in... (and I do mean hanging out... upside-down) lest I get a head full of bat poo.
	When you hold a real live koala at the The Lone Pine Sanctuary, they smell really funky
	Moreton Bay Bugs taste better than any lobster you'll ever eat in the states.
	People talk to each other in movie theatres like they're sitting in their own living rooms.
	Cab drivers are friendly, they don't smell, they speak English, and you don't see their buttcracks when they bend over.
	People that work in government offices (such as the post office) are genuinely friendly and happy to be there.
	Hats are in... overalls are NOT!
	A pair of Nikes will cost you at least $150 US and a pair of Levis will put you out $90 US.

The Gold Coast

I spent a weekend at the Gold Coast. It is a resort area about an hour south of Brisbane. Surfers Paradise is a famous beach area with lots of high-rise hotels. Everybody speaks Japanese... it reminded me a lot of Hawaii that way!

Besides going swimming at the beach at Surfer's Paradise, I went on a Showboat Cruise.

Cairns / Port Douglas / Daintree , Queensland

I got to spend a long weekend in tropical North Queensland. I stayed in a resort called The Treetops in a small town north of Cairns called Port Douglas. There, I got to take a Daintree Rainforest tour which included the following:

	Eating tree ants that tasted like lemon juice (their butts have a high concentration of vitamin C... no joke)
	Looking at lots of lovely little lizards
	Taking a tour boat up the Daintree River to see real, live, BIG Saltwater Crocodiles.
	Driving through pineapple plantations.
	Getting hissed and swiped at by a big red kangaroo at The Rainforest Habitat Wildlife Sanctuary. (The big red ones are mean, folks!)
	Eating "local" food including various unidentifiable fruits and "Barramundi" fish.
	Getting surprised by a big huge brown furry spider in a public restroom as I sat helplessly in "mid-stream".

The next day, I went scuba diving on the Great Barrier Reef! We took a big huge catamaran called a "QuickSilver WavePiercer" out to a permanent platform, and I scuba dived twice! I got to do the following:

	Pet a big huge spotty fish.
	Touch the inside of a giant clam and remove my hand before it closed up. (The inside was a blue color with little purple spots.... amazing!)
	Pick up a "sea worm"
	See lots of tropical fish and funny coral creatures I've never seen before.
	It was like I was floating around on a another planet.
	After that, I met two girls on the trip back to Port Douglas. They worked for Qantas Airlines, so they took me to dinner that night and expensed it to Qantas!

Melbourne, Victoria

By far, my most favorite place in Australia was Melbourne. This was the second place I worked. Our offices were at South Bank right on the Yarra river. I loved my walk to work everyday because I got to cross under a historical train station on Flinders Street and walk over a bridge crossing over the Yarra.

A new fancy schmancy gambling casino down the river from our offices opened while I was there. I won $50... woo hoo!

My favorite thing about Melbourne was a man named Julian Napper. He was a former I.T. manager for the Oceania region of our company (Australia, New Zealand, & New Guinea), but he was back to work part-time to help out with the work I was doing there.

Here's Julian bungee jumping:

Julian quickly learned that I was growing very fond of wombats... these short, stocky, extremely cute cousins of the koalas. So, he took me to Healesville Sanctuary on a quest to get me to pet a wombat! Success was had! I petted a wombat named "River".

Wombats!

Another neat thing I got to do was go on a river tour that took us out to see Melbourne's penguins.

Fun with Aussie Lingo

Food Lingo

In United States	In Australia
mustard	dijon
whole wheat	multigrain
butter	margarine (pronounced mar.jar.REEEN) Something they always put on sandwiches... like a replacement for mayonnaise
ham	leg ham
bun	roll
cookie	biscuit or "bickie". The most famous are Arnott's brand.
nasty brown yeast extract that smells like old vitamins and tastes worse	vegemite
ketchup	tomato sauce (pronounced tow-MAH-tow)
french fries	chips
pepper (as in a bell pepper)	capsicum
good or delicious or tasty food	"beautiful" food or "nice" food
ice tea	no equivalent
pickles	no equivalent
candy	lollies
Milky Way Candy Bar	Mars Bar
Mars Candy Bar	Mars Bar with Almonds
3 Musketeers Candy Bar	Milky Bar
Dr. Pepper	They have it in some places, but most Aussies hate it... they say it tastes like cough syrup.
coffee	Instant Sanka (very few Aussies drink fresh brewed coffee... they prefer the powdered instant stuff)
Sprite, 7-up or any other lemon-lime carbonated soda	Lemonade
lemonade	no equivalent... they don't drink it
Burger King	Hungry Jacks (some law about using the word "King" in the name of a business... has to do with them being a British Commonwealth)
McDonalds	"Mackers"
ICE	Ice is hard to come by in any restaurant or home.

So basically, the first time I walked into a deli and ordered:

"A ham sandwich on whole wheat bread with extra pickles and mustard, with an ice tea."

I may as well have just ordered:

"Goo goo goo goo goo goo goo."

Here's the corrected order:

"A leg ham sandwich on a multi-grain roll with dijon and no mar.jar.REEEN, with a glass of water with ice in it, please."

General Lingo:

In United States	In Australia
Good Morning, Hi	G'day (yes... they really do say this a lot)
Good for you!	Good on ya!
How are you doing?	How are you going?
You'll be o.k.	You'll be right
Photographs	pickies
Tasmania	Tazzie
Brisbane	Brizzie
Breakfast	breakie (pronounced brek.ee)
Have a Barbeque	The barbeque grill is just a flat metal grill (no grates to let smoke through to the food). It's like frying something on the stove... only outside.
A keg party or "beer bust"	Piss-up
Drunk	Pissed
Bathroom	The Loo
Have a good time getting drunk!	I hope you lose your legs!
Pharmacy	Chemist
Bathing Suit / Swimsuit	Bathers or Swimmers
Australia	OZ